Over the last year, our lives have changed pretty significantly. To begin the year 2008, we found out my dad was sick with pancreatic cancer and knew that he wouldn’t be with us much longer. My wife then had our 3rd child, Henry in February 2008 just after we found out the news of my dad. We named him Henry Rodger Scoville, after my dad and Henry B. Eyring of the First Presidency of LDS Church.
My dad loved Henry. He said to me that Henry had come as a blessing from our Father in Heaven to cheer my dad up during this stressful and painful time as his life winded down and the cancer became more severe. I know Henry cheered my dad up. My dad loved babies and children. He was eager to help calm crying babies and kids down. He did that for all of our children at one point or another.
My dad was also a very hard worker. He worked many late nights at the office in his attempts to take care of our family and also repay his debts to society that he had incurred. He was honest and kind.
He loved us very much and showed us more than he told us; but I don’t remember many swim meets where my dad wasn’t in the stands or a timer at the side of the pool supporting myself or a sibling. He also loved to watch us play water polo. My brother Spencer and I were the only ones in the family to play. I was grateful he was there and often holding our old video camera so we could watch the videos later. Hmmm. I wonder where those old tapes of ours are. It would be nice to see them transferred to DVD.
My dad also loved his rich heritage from farm life in Southern Alberta Canada. He lived in many small towns there but to name a few Magrath, Medicine Hat, and others. My grandfather was a rancher who worked the farm for most of his life until he worked for Goodyear (I believe) until he retired. My dad loved telling stories of his childhood and also hunting and shooting guns. I went out with my youngest sister and her fiance to shoot guns at the Delta shooting range a few weeks ago and it brought back many memories of shooting with my dad.
As I have received emails from my siblings over the last week or two, I’ve been reminded of the great example my father was for all of us. I literally cannot believe that it has been over a year since my father passed away from the cancer. I still remain glad that he didn’t have to suffer long with the intense pain he was experiencing, but it doesn’t change the fact that I miss him. I’m sure my siblings do too as well, and more so, my mother. We want the very best for her. She has managed life well and seems to be enjoying life in Delta for as long as she would like.
I began a full-time job at that time; working for Outback Therapeutic Expeditions. I really enjoyed my year with them. I love wilderness therapy. I believe that working with adolescent youth is a crucial time period where influence to help boys and girls at the age is more effective than waiting until they are young adults or adults with their own families to learn to overcome their challenges and problems.
I am now in the process of finishing up my dissertation and comprehensive exam revisions. I know my dad would be proud of me and that is not related to my success but that he’d feel that I’m getting closer to knowing what I want to do with my life and pursuing it. He was a great supporter of getting as much education as possible.
I miss my dads hugs. I know I’m thirty, married, and father of three children and I love all the hugs I can get, but there is something different about getting a hug from your father or mother.
I’m grateful to be a part of a loving family. We had a great weekend in Richfield with my brothers and oldest sister and their families with my mom for Memorial Day weekend. We returned home last night but this weekend is special. I know he didn’t serve in any war, but I’m wanting to honor him and the great legacy of hope and faith that he has left for me and for my family. I hope that his example will be remembered by his siblings, my siblings, and all others that knew him.
I was reading scriptures with my son, Oscar, on the topic of Malachi when he was discussing the hearts of the children turn to the fathers and the hearts of the fathers to the children. He asked about Grandpa Scoville and said that he missed him. I told him I did too and I became choked up so we talked for a time about the role that grandparents play in our lives and then how we’ll have the opportunity to see them again. I’m grateful for the knowledge that we can see one another in the next life.
I hope my children can remember me with more fond memories than just me being upset with them for not putting away their toys or not getting ready for school fast enough. Makes me stop and think what are the messages I’m sending them about what is important in life and where does our focus need to be.
Happy Memorial Day to all those who are remembering soldiers who have died while serving our country and the cause of freedom throughout time. Thank you to all serving in the armed forces now.
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